there are two foxes inside of you

they are yelling at each other.

GOD they're LOUD

caps 

@zac you ever hear some foxes fucking in the woods outside your house? Let us assure you that it is distinctive 🙁

@violet @zac

Yeah they are (IRL).... best way I describe them is "screaming female"

@zac

*raises paw*

Uh... /technically/ there are four of me but I'll roll with it :D

#PluralJokes

@zac I hug them both. They continue to scream. "If you think about it, this is fucking cool," I say, but you can't hear me because the screaming has drowned me out completely.

@Colophonscrawl @zac afterwards, you notice things aren't as loud as they used to be.

You decide that your hearing is important and buy some hearing protection for the next bout with your foxes.

@violet @zac I am woken up in the middle of the night. The foxes have dug my ear plugs out from my ears. The ear plugs are in tatters now. Destroying them has excited the foxes; they begin to scream with even greater passion. It is 3:30 in the morning.

blood 

blood 

re: blood 

re: blood, surgery mention 

@Colophonscrawl @zac
This is the ideal thread. You might not like it, but this is actually peak performance.

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